How Not to be Weird at Interviews!

Let’s get back to one of my favorites topics, my job interview experiences – an idea which was the genesis for this blog.

We are going to be talking about InterPhew #17. If you have been following my blog, you know my experiences are in no particular order, it’s all Jeremy Bearimy, baby!

I received a call from a tech start-up company, and I had read about them. They were an upcoming organization in the Artificial Intelligence space. Since they were upcoming, I guess they thought it would be super fun to have 345 rounds before making a decision about the candidates. I am not exaggerating. I had an HR round, then hiring manager, then senior manager, then vice president, then senior vice president, then director, then CTO. Oh, and did I mention that among these pertinent rounds, I also had a sprinkling of what I can only presume irrelevant rounds.

I am all for being absolutely sure about the people you hire as a company. You want them to stick around with you for a considerable time, you want to invest in their training, you want to make sure that the budgets are met while training and ramping up new hires, you want to make sure that they don’t leave after joining, you want them to be invested in you and your company mission and vision. God forbid, if a candidate leaves, you have to start the whole process once again from square one.

 

So, It was pretty comical that I was being interviewed by people that were in NO way connected with the business segment I was applying for. Imagine you are interviewing for a computer game company as a Graphic Designer and you are interviewed by the facilities manager! No logic whatsoever.

Here I was appearing for a customer success role within this company and my next round was scheduled with the Senior Vice President. I was given the Zoom details and logged in on time. Only to find out that the person who had logged in from the other side was not the Senior VP. I mean I would know. I had done my research. I had looked up the Senior VP on LinkedIn (after receiving the calendar invite with her name mentioned), I had slid into her DM’s and liked 17 videos of her poodle doing tricks by the pool.

 

I kid! No, but I knew for sure that the woman on the other end was not the Senior VP. Anyway, she cleared up the air and told me that she would be taking my interview as she has got some urgent deliverables to take care of.

 

Alright, let’s get the show started, I thought. We exchanged pleasantries. The usual ice-breakers, "How are you?”, "tell me about yourself” et al.

 

Then the weirdness started. The first question she asks is “If the Number 2 toothpaste is the most popular, why’s it still number 2?”. To put it mildly, I was bamboozled. I didn’t know what to respond to. I just went with the flow and thought this was one of those intellectual questions, which are there to judge a candidate’s ability to be agile, and quick on their feet while doing logical reasoning. So I responded with "Well, the number 2 toothpaste is the most popular because it’s mostly consumed in rural areas in India. Since we know, the population is higher as compared to urban cities which endorse the number 1 brand, that makes the market share of the number 2 toothpaste higher, hence popular"

She just looks at me, stoic. I think we both knew, I BS’d through that first question, or maybe not… Both she and I remain silent for an awkward 10 seconds before she proceeds.

 

"What if I hit your funny bone, right now, would it really hurt and why?”

Me: Thinking what a strange situation to be in. Out loud “Can you give more information on that? Are we talking about the actual funny bone which is part of the elbow over which passes the ulnar nerve, which may cause numbness and pain along the forearm and hand if knocked, OR are we talking about my sense of humor, located as an imaginary physical organ?”

She: "It’s your choice.”

Me: "Well, I would say I hope you hit my imaginary funny bone so that I quickly recover from it and come back with a creative repartee. And lucky that we are having this conversation virtually, which saves you from a lawsuit, eh?”

 

Again, with the poker face. She was just not giving me any rope, was she?

3 seconds.

5 seconds.

7 seconds.

 

She then asks, “Why is the third hand on the watch called the second hand?”.

 

Me: “Ages ago, when human beings invented the concept of measuring time, they segregated it into hours, minutes, and seconds. The hands could have been named anything they wanted. My best guess is, that they coined the names of hours and minutes first, and they were left with the third hand on the clock. When they came up with the name seconds, they named the third hard for seconds.”

 

Suffice it to say, I was done. Like stick a fork in me, I was done (Chandler style). I was getting very uncomfortable with the line of questioning. In the back of my head, in the 3^rd tab open just beside the LinkedIn tab, the Google tab, I was searching for "high functioning sociopaths, psychopaths, what to do if they have your address and contact number?"

 

I came out of my inane personality trait of being nice and just asked her if there were any questions related to the job in question, my work experience, my responsibilities, etc. At which point, another person logs in to the Zoom meeting and introduces herself to be the Senior VP. She tells me that the other person was actually her PA. She had requested her PA to be on the call with me, to keep me occupied while she took care of some things.

I was quiet. I did not know how to react to this information. I was trying to figure out if what she was saying was actually true, or was this another interview tactic to rile up a candidate and see how they react to the first person. Then, to see how the candidate would maintain their demeanor during the actual interview.

Needless to say, I am quite a “bring it on” kinda gal. I kept a calm exterior and was able to shake the previous conversation off me and dive right into this one.

 

I would love to hear from you in the comments below. What would you do if you were faced with such an interview? Let’s discuss!